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hey this is the leo 4 actualize org and in this video I'm going to talk about how to relieve stress okay welcome back how to relieve stress alright so let's get into this stress all of us are stressed right who is not stressed in this modern crazy world with all the stuff that we have on our plates we are living a really twenty-seven hour a day cycle in only 24 hours and we're trying to cram it all in there we're so overwhelmed our boss is driving us mad our clients are driving us mad our spouse is driving us mad our girlfriend or boyfriend is driving us mad or kids are driving us mad our task list and our calendars are driving us mad our emails our phones are blowing up how do we get peace in this life okay it can be hard right especially now when everything is on everything's interconnected we've got the internet we've got cell phones you literally are always at the beck and call of somebody else 24/7 right whether it's your parents or your business your career boss somebody's always nagging you for something so how do we relieve this stuff and how do we also relieve ourselves with the pressure that we put on ourselves from these lofty goals that we have you know especially if we're out there and we're living ambitious kind of like the kind of life that we're here Ashley has that org is pausing you know the charge kind of life where you're not just sitting back on your couch watching television all day or your life is about going out there and living something bigger it's about contributing your greatest gifts to about fulfilling your full potential it's about learning and challenging yourself and living on your edge I tend to find that when you're doing that you tend to get stressed sometimes right you get stressed from the gym workouts you get stressed from the meditation sessions you do you get stressed from staying on your diet you get stressed from pushing your business forward so I feel all that myself so it's good to have some techniques so what I'm going to give you here is some techniques and I'm going to give you some understanding about what is causing your stress so you can start getting handle on this alright so first of all the most important point if you take away one thing I want you to take away this is that stress even though it feels like it's coming from the world it's actually coming from yourself you are putting stress on yourself all of your stress I don't care how bad it is is it's all self created this is actually a deep point this is an advanced self development point that I'm sure most of you will not be able to appreciate if you've been doing personal development though and if you've been following along with my videos and you've really been thinking about this stuff then you're starting to get a sense of this inner outer world distinction that I talked about and you start to get a sense that really it's not the circumstances that are creating the feelings in your life but it's your reactions to those circumstances this is something that's been echoed literally for millennia from Western old-school ancient philosophy from stoicism to from the ancient Stoics to ancient Greeks and ancient Romans Eastern philosophies modern self-help gurus if you study this material you start to understand that there's something to this idea and at first it kind of just dawns on you that you know maybe there's something true to this and then as you start to actually take responsibility to take ownership of what you're feeling in your life taking ownership of your feelings and your thoughts and you just commit to taking full responsibility for it and not blaming anything outside yourself and you start to become more conscious and you start to get more aware throughout your day of really what is going on what are you thinking what are you feeling why is this happening it dawns on you that you are creating all of it your ego is creating all of it the struggle you're facing in your life is being created by a need to uphold your self-image to live up to your ego and that this is entirely avoidable if you go through the personal development work that is necessary so right now maybe you're just getting introduced to this idea and seem a little bit like whoa I don't know what he's talking about this doesn't apply to me first of all I guarantee you that it applies to you'd apply serve a human being because we all have the same basic biological psychology but the deeper idea is here I want you to start to say to yourself okay maybe there's something to this just open your mind to it and start to be a little bit more aware of how you are responsible for the stress that you are creating in your life and you will responsible both for the good and for the bad and by responsible I don't mean that you're guilty and that you're blameworthy and that you need to be judged for the stress you're creating in life just the fact that you are creating it or allowing it and this is a big big shift to make in your mindset because up to this point you probably have not been very conscious of how much you have been responsible not blameworthy responsible for the stress that you've been creating that means that if you're stressed at work realize that okay you are putting yourself into that environment you chose to work there you chose to take those projects on you chose to start that business you chose to be in that relationship you chose to be in this marriage all of these things are conscious choices or maybe unconscious choices but you made these choices right and you always have the option of backing out of them or tinkering with them to make sure that they're working better for you and so you might be saying well yeah sure I chose to be in my marriage but I didn't want my marriage to be as stressful as it is right now okay granted but take responsibility you got to stop this making of excuses where you say well I did choose this but I didn't choose the bad parts of it no you chose that thing and it comes with the good and the bad and in fact that good and bad that distinction doesn't exist in the external world it only exists in your mind so the reason I'm hammering on this idea and I'm going to go into more practical techniques that you can use to reduce your stress is because this is hitting at the root at the root cause I don't want to just give you little band-aids over this wound this wound is coming from the fact that you're not recognizing the cause once you start taking responsibility for these things then you're going to start to see opportunities opportunity is going to open up for you windows you're gonna open up for you're gonna see like oh maybe I shouldn't be working at that job so much maybe I should be taking on that new project because actually what I want is I want some peace time with my family I want some time to myself I wanted some time to go fishing I want to some time to go read that book that I wanted to write to read or maybe that book that I wanted to write whatever maybe start that blog that I've been dreaming of starting you know starting to realize that maybe you start to realize that that relationship you're in that marriage you're in it's not really healthy for you and that it's too stressful for you that it's time to to change it there's nothing wrong with making changes so start to realize that start to realize how you're creating your own stresses so as far as actually how to reduce your stress and how to relieve it here are some ideas another distinction I wanna introduce here is that there are good ways to relieve stress and bad ways what is this pain a good way is a healthy way it means it's a way that's going to empower you it's going to enrich you and it's going to put you into a stronger position than you were before a bad way is a disempowering way which is basically a crutch that is maybe relieving stress in the short term but it's actually robbing you of your life and your potential and your energy in the long run and maybe it's creating even more stress down the road on a long-term basis so bad is kind of like using a credit card to pay for that impulse purchase that you've got right it might be fulfilling at the beginning but it's really not smart long-term so this is what I mean by good and bad here are some good ways all right number one exercise physical activity sports this is huge so going to the gym great way to relieve stress whether it's strength training cardio then sports whether you're doing sports the gym team sports getting involved in sports somehow is a great way I actually find that you know after high school and college we kind of tend to fall out of the whole sports scene but it's a good way to get yourself back and into doing something that's like really fun and stress relieving is to get yourself into some sort of league sport you know whether it's soccer maybe a softball team or even just maybe mentoring kids and being out there being out in nature and fresh air moving your body this is important this starts to release chemicals in your brain that actually start to make you feel better start to relax you just the fact that you're moving your body puts you in a flow state gets you out of that self-consciousness mode even simple things like going for a walk or taking a hike taking just kind of a lazy bike ride those can all be great ways to unwind another one is reading reading books read something high-quality another one is meditation yoga oh man I'd probably put this at the top of the list if you get involved with meditation at the beginning can be tough to build that practice but the long-term benefits of that are just amazing right now about six to eight weeks into my meditation practice where I'm doing meditation every day for an hour and the effects I'm seeing on stress relief there are just incredible incredible so I highly encourage you to get involved with meditation if you've never if you're well even if you've tried it but if you haven't built a habit of it I really encourage you to build that habit and I have other videos that will tell you how to do that all right next listening to music is a great way to unwind slow your mind down another great way is family time create some quiet time with your family whether it's around the dinner table playing a board game just having a conversation going for family walk going to you know the baseball games some sort of family activity whatever that is just having time to do that so that you're not bothered by this stuff that can be really rewarding it's going to increase your happiness relieve all your stress and if you have some sort of creative hobby that you engage in or think about picking one up whether it's learning how to play the guitar how to play the piano maybe arts and crafts maybe you've got some sort of writing project that you want to work on maybe you've got your car you want to work on your mechanical tinkerer type of person you want to get your hands dirty you know whatever that is have some sort of hobby in your life at least one that you like to engage in and that you're building skill in this is going to be a great way to relieve stress for you so those are some good ways now let's talk about some bad ways these are ways that you do not want to use one gambling do not gamble whether it's online or here in Las Vegas or anywhere else don't gamble this bad way to relieve stress it's also not very smart for you financially shopping compulsive shopping this has been a problem actually for me is that sometimes I will get compulsive on my shopping and go on Amazon store buying [ __ ] up that I don't need stop that stop buy stuff the buying is not making you happy in the long run right it's just a short little little stimulus little excitement but it's not doing anything for you a positive long run smoking drinking drugs any kind of chemical addictions or abuses that you're partaking in definitely cut those out those are not helping your stress in a healthy way they're also destroying your body which is going to start to show and manifest itself in all sorts of bad ways as you age and grow older so get that out of your system right now video games not a good way to relieve stress it's kind of a low consciousness way to do it internet browsing also not good television also not good if you're addicted to watching negative news cable news can be very addicting even reading the newspaper just being too plugged into that kind of stuff being plugged into gossip get that get that off get that off your whole radar this is preventing you from living that kind of extraordinary life that you are capable of living so stop all that stuff and it's actually probably creating more stress down the road for you because that smoking that you're doing those drugs you're taking that over eating that you're partaking in you know that compulsive shopping that internet watching that TV watching it might relieve some stress right now in a minute in the hour but it's it's actually building ups other stresses like guilt procrastination laziness lack of productivity all of that is being built up over days and weeks and years and that is that is destroying you that's creating more and more stress right it's creating a lower quality life for you so those are my ideas on how to relieve stress pretty simple these have been documented well documented a lot of these ideas aren't sharing with you have actually been scientifically proven with studies that have been done so go ahead and right now commit to taking some action number one I want you to identify what is causing you the most stress in your life just be conscious of it don't judge yourself for it just let's identify it is it your work and what's specifically at work is it your relationship and what's specifically in your relationship identify that and take responsibility for it don't blame it on anyone else even at work don't blame it on your boss in your relationship don't blame it on your spouse or your girlfriend or boyfriend take responsibility for it so that's number one number two is I want you to commit to one thing that you're going to do that's going to start to relieve your stress what is that going to be for you are you gonna have to start playing some sports do you want to do some exercise do you want to maybe read some more set aside some family time set aside some time for listening to music pick up a creative hobby that you've been dreaming of picking up but you just haven't taken any action on commit to one of those whatever is going to fit with your personality and your life right now and then the last thing is I want you to really look and identify one bad thing that is a crutch that you're using it's one of these bad stress relievers that you really need to pull yourself out of so gambling shopping smoking internet television identify one of those and commit to pulling yourself out of it for most of you I can bet television is something that you can pull out right now cut out and that's going to give you a huge quality life improvement so try television if you don't know anything else or if you have something else maybe drugs shopping that you're addicted to pull yourself out of that all right so those are gave me some great ways for you to start to get a handle on your stress this is I'll be signing off as always please comment I want to hear what you think about this and other ways that you have found for relieving stress what's worked for you go ahead like this and share this please because I really want to spread this this content around I think it's useful if you find it useful share with your friends and your colleagues at work or whoever and then of course if you're really buying into this idea of living to your full potential and you want to really take your light to that next level and you want to be out there living your purpose sharing your gifts with the world and you know that this is something 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